On the Street…. Sixth Avenue Helvetica Whore

I wake up at 4 in the morning sweating, remembering that my apartment's recently revamped elevator has had its elevator level buttons font changed from Helvetica to….
I can hardly say it….
Calibri.
The first time I saw it I felt faint, I just couldn't reach for the button. For ten minutes I waited in terror, my hand hovering over the 7 and ½ floor, until our janitor, John, walked in and pressed the sans-serif cleartype monstrosity for me.
I've used the stairs and cursed Microsoft ever since.